Check Out Those Ads! – Marvel Holiday Special Mutant Melodies

In the last issue we looked at the 1991 Marvel Holiday Special. It was a good issue but didn’t feature any ads. It did however have great artwork of all your favorite Marvel characters enjoying the Christmas season.

The centerfold in the Marvel Holiday Special wasn’t Rogue or Storm, they saved that for the Swimsuit Issue. The centerfold was even better, traditional Christmas songs with new, X-Men inspired lyrics.

Marvel Holiday Special Mutant Melodies

The songs were labeled as Mutant Melodies II. I have searched high and low and cannot find any reference to Mutant Melodies I. If they exist I’d like to see them.

While your sitting around drinking eggnog and humming Christmas tunes remember the lyrics below. They will add a nice comic theme to your next Christmas party.

Enjoy Mutant Melodies from the Marvel Holiday Special.

PS. All lyrics are written by Kelly Corvese, writer and editor of hundreds of Marvel comics.

Buy Yourself Another X-Men Spin-Off

(Sung to the tune of Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas)

Marvel Holiday Special Merry Little Christmas

Buy yourself another X-Men spin-off
Though the prices rise
From now on store orders will be twice the size.
Buy yourself another X-Men spin-off
Make your parents pay
You’ll be reading twenty-four hours a day

Here you are going out of your mind
Trying hard to find X-Force
Comics stores may be all sold out
So stand up and shout GET MORE!

Through the years we only had uncanny
Causing quite a stir
Now Factor Force and don’t forget Excalibur
Buy yourself another X-Men spin-off now.

Twelve Days of X-Men

(Sung to the tune of Twelve Days of Christmas)

Marvel Holiday Special 12 Days of Christmas

On the first day of Christmas Xavier gave to me, a bisque of Wolverine
On the second day of Christmas Xavier gave to me, two identities
On the third day of Christmas Xavier gave to me, three sharp claws
On the fourth day of Christmas Xavier gave to me, four furry Ferals
On the fifth day of Christmas Xavier gave to me, five ruby quartz
On the sixth day of Christmas Xavier gave to me, six Cables shooting
On the seventh day of Christmas Xavier gave to me, seven Banshees screaming
On the eighth day of Christmas Xavier gave to me, eight Meggans shifting
On the ninth day of Christmas Xavier gave to me, nine Kittys phasing
On the tenth day of Christmas Xavier gave to me, ten Iceman chilling
On the eleventh day of Christmas Xavier gave to me, eleven Gambits dealing
On the twelfth day of Christmas Xavier gave to me, twelve plot-lines hanging

Mutant Hunts

(Sung to the tune of Jingle Bells)

Marvel Holiday Special Jingle Bells

Banshee’s always loud
Psylocke’s race has changed
Storm is one with clouds
You could call it strange

Beast has got blue fur
Nightcrawler’s got a tail
Kylun’s a barbarian
But why throw them in jail?

Mutant Hunts, Mutant Hunts
Have them in a rage
Why are non-muts making laws
To put ‘em in a cage

Iceman seems so cold
Polaris had green hair
Logan’s very old
No wonder people stare

Rogue looks like a skunk
Phoenix is a mess
Jubilee’s a punk
And we’re just prejudice


(Sung to the tune of Vogue)

Marvel Holiday Special Rogue

Look around everywhere you turn there’re mutants
They’re everywhere that you go, look around
They will try everything they can to escape
The pain of the life that they know as super heroes
Christmas time they all long to be
Hanging up mistletoe
I know a mutant who must stay away
A kiss would be kind but she’ll steal your mind
They call her…

Rogue, Rogue
Get away from the mistletoe
A no no! Come on Rogue
Get your powers under control
You know you can do it

All you need is your own determination
So use it. That’s what it’s for. That’s what it’s for.
Holidays, make you want to reach out to them
You’ll leave em feeling sore. Feeling very sore
It makes no difference if they’re bad or good
If they’re a boy or girl
If contact’s made then unfortunately
You’ll steal their powers and their memories
Just stop it.

Lorna Dane and Domino. Psylocke adn Ororo
Professor X, Scott and Jean, no one comes in between
You see Wolverine, on the cover of all magazines
Alysande, Alistaire, Archangel’s dance on air
They have style, they have grace
Watch Mystique change her face
Phoenix, Meggan, Kitty too Alan Davis we love you
Mutants with an attitude
Christmas puts them in the mood
Deck the hall, Let’s get to it
One X-Man can never do it.

Marvel Holiday Full Cover_sm

Until next time, keep your comics bagged and boarded…unless you want to thumb through them to check out the great ads!

Check out the previous installments of
Check Out Those Ads!

About Pitfall Gary 122 Articles
Just your average Gen X'er. Born in the 70s and raised in the Decade of Decadence! I rode my bike without a helmet and was home when the street lights came on. I love to reminisce about the good ol' days; Movies, TV, music, if it happened in my childhood I'll share it with you.

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